Living Life in Abundance

For the last two weeks, I have been plagued with illnesses in my home. It started with one child having a cold, which then transferred to the other child. After that, the older one had an allergic reaction, to what, I have no idea.

Don’t get me wrong, I am in no way complaining, because I know that these illnesses cannot be compared to what some other parents have to endure. While it was overwhelming for me because it was one after the other, it was still not as severe as what some families encounter.

So today, I am pausing to say, “thank you God, for your grace, for your mercies, and for your blessings. I know you know what I can handle and so I know that through it all, you have my back.” It is that simple for me.

I read today in my devotions about keeping life about one thing because in doing so it makes your life much simpler and I smiled because I understood the truth in that. Complications are distracting and they detract from the abundance of life. It is also possible to add that more often than not, when we are leading a complicated life, we are involving something that is not of God. Stop and do a quick check and see…

We must be ‘about our Father’s business.’ This is a profound statement to me because it provides the realization that whatever you are involved in represents who your ‘father’ is. So in this crazy upside down world, where being busy has become so overrated, I have chosen to slow down and be about the things of my father. My father’s business requires me to live the way He wants me to live, to give until there is no more to give, to love until there is just no more love because I can never, never out-love the Lord.

Have a blessed day, today.

 

Simplifying Me

I took a break from my challenge because life became overwhelming; being all that you can be is not an easy task. However, I am back to my challenge and this week, I will attempt to write a post each day. The challenge within the challenge is to write my thoughts as they come within a ten minutes time frame. The activity will help me to recognize the things that are occupying my brain space so that I can focus on the topic of ‘my book’ and in essence, I will understand me a little more.

So here goes:

Today, I woke up wanting more sleep. I got to bed at 2:19am and my alarm went off at 5:15am. I was completely annoyed. I did not get up though, I rolled over and laid in bed for another 2 hrs. While lying in bed I thought about my writing, realizing that my confidence has grown through posting and publishing some articles, so now I should move on to the next level of focusing on either completing one of my three unfinished books or beginning a new one.

My mind then took me to a mental check of what my day will be like, and while it is overflowing with things I need to get done, I made the promise to myself that I will stop and breathe at least once today.

In the middle of that thought Zee knocked on my door and I knew my ‘me time’ was over, I now had to face today, but before I do, I stopped and prayed. Of late my prayers have been random and this morning was no different. I found myself praying for the very small things; being appreciative of love, my family and friends, and even the opportunity to be living in this beautiful place call Whidbey Island.

I also took the opportunity to write a love note to hubby to remind him of how much I love him. Seriously, deployment is no joke, and anyone who decides to join the military needs to be aware of how difficult it can be to cope with such long absences. I am certain that we are able to endure this, our first of many, because of our faith in God. It certainly has given us the strength to overcome and shed light on the many lies and attempts that the enemy uses to distract and destroy couples. It is because of my faith in God, I can keep on loving and trusting this man even though he is half way around the world. As a matter of fact, my love for him has multiplied immensely, and the most wonderful thing is that his expressions of love have also intensified. Only God, I say!

There is no deep rooted message from me today and I think that’s okay because one of the things I have realized is that once in awhile I need to uncomplicated my day and simply take things slow. Life is already in the way, so for today, I will just go with the flow.

Tendai Mwari

 

Deferred Action

I know that this post is extremely late and I apologize. I woke up late (7am) and today was the day when everything decided to be a challenge. I must make a quick mention of my older son’s inability to grasp every lesson today. What was going on with the universe? He took over 3hrs to complete one math lesson. By the end of the school day (normally 3pm but extended to 6pm today), I was ready to jump in my bed and call it a day. I however, had way too much left to do and I needed to keep my word and post.

I take it that everyone is aware of Deferred Action, which is now being called DACA, and what it is supposed to offer to our young people…or should I say, young immigrants. I also take it that you, my readers, may know persons who are currently applying, or have applied. As such, I see it as pertinent to explain or provide some advice pertaining to this immigration process.

As we are aware, or should be aware, DACA is a policy memo, a discretionary decision by USCIS to allow eligible individuals to remain in the United States for a renewable two-year period, and it also allows them to apply for work authorization. The basis of the eligibility is that the applicant must have entered the country as a child, is under a certain age, has maintained presence in the USA, has had some education here, and has good moral standards (no criminal records – this is also dependent on the type of crime though).

While this application provides some benefits, though limited, it must be noted that DACA is not a guarantee and if you are not eligible, you might be placed in deportation. As a result, I strongly recommend that if you or someone you know is applying or thinking about applying, you should contact a knowledgeable attorney, or attend a free clinic within your community.

Also, it is important that applicants know that this is not the Dream Act, nor is it a way for one to gain citizenship. Accordingly, an applicant’s family members will not be allowed to benefit from the applicant’s approved application.

My hang up about DACA is that it is not a law, it is a mere policy decision that can be changed at a moments notice. This leaves me in limbo when I am asked to provide advice as to whether or not one should apply. On one hand, I recommend the application because of its benefits (work authorization, social security number, driver’s license, etc), but on the other hand, I am timid and am somewhat waiting for the bottom to drop, so to speak. As such, each situation must be reviewed and treated on an individual basis. There should be no ‘boiler plate’ approach. Your situation is definitely different to your friend’s and must be reviewed as such.

In reading a few articles, and listening to a few seminars, I don’t believe I am the only one with these mixed emotions. However, most of us attorney’s have come to the conclusion that applying is a ‘good thing’ if you ‘genuinely’ meet the criteria. While this is true, I must hasten to warn against predators. Beware of those who tell you that they can guarantee the approval of your application even if you have not fully met the requirements. They are out there! Please ensure that the person filing your application is licensed either as an attorney or as an approved immigration advisor, and feel free to shop around for the representation you feel comfortable with.

Was DACA an election move for the President? Certainly, but he has opened the door to a movement, so if he thought this was the last say on immigration for him, he better prays that he loses. If he wins, he will have an even louder voice in his ear, demanding that the Dream Act be passed. If he doesn’t win, then Mr. Romney will be weighted down with the fate of tons of young people, whom he can sway to love him, or hate him even more…

 

Milestone

It is the end of my first challenge week and I am happy with myself. I stuck with it and I posted everyday. Sometimes I would miss the morning posting but I made sure that I found a moment to sneak in a post at some point throughout the day. I am elated and so I did my ‘I did it’ dance. That u should see, but since I am too shy to show you how crazy I can be I will describe it to you. It is the waving of my hands, in the air, as if I am swatting a fly, then I turn around until I begin to feel as dizzy as you feel when leaving a ‘giddy house.’ After-which I sit down, catch my breath and smile. Now it is time for the next step.

It is befitting that I am writing this after church today because God used my Pastor to encourage and motivate me for this new phase. This new phase will take me out of my comfort zone and back into where I once loved to be. I plan to awaken my interest in current affairs and will endeavor to use my legal skills to analyze, and find a way to add a motivational spin to current issues. I plan to provide information, as well as, my opinions, and I plan to be bold, confronting issues that I believe are important to the masses.

This week will be challenging because I have resigned to not having an opinion about these issues, and I have been starved of debates relating to these matters, but I have a plan. I will take one day at a time and I will push myself. I will also be consistent with my reading of the newspapers, watching CNN, and listening to radio talk shows. I have a goal and am going to work at it this week, and while this will require more work, I am ready to go. So here goes! Look out for my first post tomorrow, it will be interesting.

Before I close, I must thank all the readers of my posts, I do appreciate it. For this week though, please comment and let’s have a discussion, I would love to hear what you think too.

Thanks again!

 

The Little Joys of a Not So Perfect Life

This morning, I want to sit back, relax and give God thanks for all He has done for me. I am so not worthy for His many blessings and His mercies. So today I will share with you a little list of my everyday joys. They are not prioritize because they are all number one in my book.

1) Listening to Ishmael sing the songs on Praise 106.5

1) Watching the boys experiencing new things

1) Watching Zee at Taekwondo and swimming

1) Communicating with my husband while he is deployed

1) Communicating with my friends and family, especially my sisters (those who are blood related and those from another mother). Also, a special mention of conversations with my mom, I look forward to hearing from her.

1) Learning from older, more seasoned married couples

1) Sharing lessons learned

1) Receiving compliments from the men in my life (Ish, Zee, and OMB)

1) Watching Ish taking pictures of everything

1) Listening to my boys pray (Ish says half of the Our Father’s Prayer then makes up the rest, and Zee prays about everything)

1) Teaching anyone

1) Reading

1) Aha moments

1) Watching the boys play…and fight (Ish thinks he is the boss and always picks a fight with Zee)

Now thats’s my list, what’s yours?

 

Hey Navy, May I Get Him Back Now?

It has been awhile, a very long time, since I last saw my husband and this morning I woke up missing him like crazy. The day he left for his deployment was bitter-sweet but right now his absence is just bitter. Waking up, yet another morning, without him is not welcoming. Let us not even mention the loneliness I feel at nights…

Today I woke up wondering what it will be like once he gets home. Will the boys respond to him in their natural manner or will they pull away? Will I be able to understand him now? Will he still be able to meet my needs? Will his smile be the same, permanently pasted in the corners of his mouth? Will he fit into the roll of things or will we have to start all over again? My head aches with all these questions and this makes me miss him even more…

Before he left we were in a good place. We were finally understanding the little things about each other and were having fun being together. He was enjoying spending time with the boys; eagerly awaiting the weekends so that he and Zee could leave early in the mornings for their fishing trips, or excitedly getting ready to teach Ishmael about racing cars, or just ‘chillaxing’ with them both, while they were all glued to the television, competing on one of the many (too many) video games that they have.

While he has been away we have intentionally worked on keeping in-touch, ensuring that we don’t miss a beat in each others life. He keeps me up to date with the latest happenings and I get to amaze him with the boys growth. He reminds me how much he loves me and the boys, and we get to compete on how creative we can be with the many ways we get to say ‘I love you’ (the boys seem to be winning this competition, with a little help from mommy).

With this deployment, we have also grown closer. Yes, we have! Our prayer life has gotten stronger and we have both become even more dependent on each other’s prayers and encouragements. We honestly can’t seem to get enough of each other.

Our intimacy has deepened as well because we now have a bond that is surpassing time and space. Our conversations are loaded with things to come…I can’t wait!

Yet, this morning I am up, anxious, feeling alone, missing him and wanting him home…

One thing for sure though, is the fact that he is an amazing husband, yes he is, and he is definitely a super dad (this is coming straight from the boys mouth). Knowing this, gives me faith that even if things are not the same when he returns, his qualities will shine forth and we will be able to enjoy each other still, the problem then is, WHEN ARE YOU COMING HOME?

We miss you OMB!

 

Remembering 9/11

While the world remembers one of the most devastating day in America’s history, I get to celebrate the birth of my first son.

9/11/01 was devastating for this nation and in looking back, there is still a sadness about that day. At the time of the attack I was in the car with Leon, heading to my mother’s home. For some reason, the skies looked dark and we were both discussing my dream of doom and how scared I felt leaving the house. Upon arriving at my mother, we found out about the first attack and the phone started ringing very loudly. My aunt in England was calling to see if I was injured by the atrocity that was being showed on her television screen. Afterwards, the phone was like a hotline, everyone wanting to know where I was and if I was okay.

This need to know if I was okay was fueled by the fact that they believed that I worked in Manhattan and so more and more of my family members were concerned about whether or not I had gone to work that day….

I, therefore, find it befitting that a year later I was chosen by God to bring forth a son in this world, and on 9/11/2002, at around 10pm, my first child was born, and I called his name Zawadi, the gift, God’s gift.

He was born to bring a smile to my face
And erase the distaste that was left after that attack.
He was born to prove that life goes on so we must get up and act.

My son, a gift from God, was given to me
So that I could see
That there is life inside of me
And that the sad day of history
Was never meant to destroy the city
But give rise to a deeper sense of loyalty,
Love, friendship, and family…

I then cannot look at 9/11 as a day of loss.
While the rest of the nation remembers it as such,
The sadness of the day was replaced by the birth of my son,
And so today, while I will never forget the incident that brought this country back to God, My heart is full of joy because today, we celebrate the day my child was born.

Happy Birthday my firstborn.

 

Raising Wholehearted Children

Becoming a mother changed me in so many ways, and then again, it really didn’t. I have always been one who aspires to do and be my best in all that I do, and so, this desire was not new to me the first time I found out I was pregnant. However, most of the sacrifices I had to make we’re like rude awakenings.

One of the sacrifices I had to make was to move my child from a very unhealthy environment. Why was this a sacrifice? It was because the unhealthy environment was fueled by his father. Here my desire to be the best wife came head to head with my desire to be the best mother and even though I was completely against divorce I eventually had to leave because of the dangers that were lurking.

Another sacrifice was whether or not to send my child to a public or private school. This became a sacrifice because I was not employed and would not be able to afford a private school. However, the public schools in the area we were living were some of the worst ones in NY. So what would the best mother do? Yes, I sent my child to a private school and have not looked back since. Only God knows how I was able to afford the monthly payments in the beginning but I did.

I could go on and on and list the many sacrifices I had to make, and more than likely these sacrifices are similar to those you have had to make, but this post is more about
why we really make these sacrifices. Why when we have children we do the things we do.
I originally said it was fueled by my desire to be the best mother but recently I realized that was not even half of the story. I realized that being the best mother was only a foundation, and the real reason is because I wanted my children to be the best they can be.

In wanting them to be the best, I sometimes cannot be the ‘best mom’ in their eyes and that’s ok. In wanting them to realize their potential, I sometimes have to say no to outside influences, and that’s ok too.
In wanting them to be well-adjusted and intelligent, I sometimes have to push them a little more than they would like, but that’s ok too.

I take my role as a mother super seriously, especially now that I am understanding what God wants from me, or expect of me. His word says to train up my children in the way they should go. This means, I, as the ‘best mother,’ must seek out the best way for each child and ensure that they are growing in that way. This means that not everything will be a part of my children’s life, and as a result, I will fight to protect them from things that are not good for them. If that means, staying home and homeschooling then so be it. If that means moving half way across the world, then fine. Whatever it takes!

This is where parenting gets tough. This is where there is a differentiation between the types of parents. This is where parenting is taken to another level, and it becomes more about the child and less about the parent.
Now, don’t get me wrong. My message here is not that you are a bad parent if you don’t homeschool, no, not at all. It is also not to dictate what sacrifices should be made because that is always dependent on your situation.

My message is this, if you are a Godfearing parent you are required to make the tough decisions, even if it causes you to sacrifice things that you love and hang on to.

God made me a steward over two beautiful boys and this means that I must act in their best interest not mine. If I desire for them to be wholehearted and the best they can be, then my life must in noway jeopardize theirs. To me and for me, this means that though the price may be high at times, I am willing to pay, believing that God has more in store, and when it is all said and done, I did my best.

Desiring that these boys of mine grow in the admonition of the Lord, grow to be respectful, grow to experience and realize their potential, and grow to understand who they are, I have accepted the responsibility to make the tough decisions, and this is what has made me the best mom.

 

My marriage is not just for today!

Today, I realized a very profound point. The life I live today will determine the way the next generation will live. While this includes everything I do, I realized that my marriage sets the tone. This gave me a new zeal to approach my marriage with more fervency. With everything in me, I am determined to live a life that is pleasing to Christ and in doing so, I must love and trust God with my whole heart. In doing so, I must love and respect my husband, after all, marriage is the union given that reflects Christ’s love for us.
I have been reading a lot about marriage recently, and while reading God has been revealing a lot of my follies and hang ups. I have been battling with old stuff and hanging on to them when I should have let go a long time ago. Father forgive me.
I have been turning the searchlight within, and while I can honestly say that I have an awesome marriage, I can also honestly say that I have not been the best wife I can be. So today, I am making a conscious effort to move forward and let go of the past. I will live a victorious married life so that this will be the legacy that I pass on to my sons.
While I know that I am not the only one in this marriage, I am standing up and declaring my willingness to do what God has called me to do in this marriage. My husband has been an amazing person and his love for me is certain. He puts up with a lot of my silliness and has decided to stick around no matter what. So I am not worried whether or not he will rise to this new approach of living to leave a legacy that speaks volume. I can actually picture him saying, “so what took you so long?”

So today, we start a new chapter!

Thank you Jesus. I love you OMB

 

I have Found My Superman

                                                                                              by Cadine Brown

Imbued with god-fearing attributes,

The sole survivor and front-runner enters…

His presence is known and can be felt by those around.

He shines his light into the darkest of place,

Dispelling every ‘dis-grace’.

His strength is known but not feared.

He champions my cause when noone else cares,

Telling me, “girl, get up and finish this race.”

His calm engulfs me, pronouncing safety.

He is my ‘whole armour’, my perfect and complete fit,

Protecting me from insecurities thrown to sink my ship.

And…

His love, oh his love

Found me, embraced me, and saved me…

Yes, I have found my superman, in God’s saving grace.